Morena – I saw this question last night, and felt the weight of what you are going through. Would be very good for you to talk to someone. I would say that many business owners feel like you right now, it has been a tough year as you say, and then you also have the pressures of thinking about the future.
Of course you can keep chatting online here digitally, or we can suggest some offline discussion – options include, Business Mentors NZ – you can apply here – https://bmnz.qlbs.com/home/signup?_ga=2.31657854.1989445369.1603995166-1629123381.1603995166&_gac=1.253439867.1603995166.CjwKCAjw0On8BRAgEiwAincsHM-oNwxeSadWyf0xtuDm7MrAzrKn1D94kSV5HkIoxgdPn4tbajvrGBoCqkYQAvD_BwE
Another option is for you to contact your local Regional Business Partner – can you tell me where you are located or if you want, email me direct on firstname.lastname@example.org and I can refer you.
You got this I am sure, just need to work through the options, and I think you are very courageous in expressing this, so well done! – Andy